Divorce is undeniably a nasty subject. Most parents and fathers will not want to force their precious children to go through such a horrendous ordeal. Nonetheless, it is vital to remember that a divorce can sometimes be a better solution than remaining together.
If you are in a tumultuous relationship with a lot of screaming and fighting, separating is definitely a good option. Eventually, it will be pertinent for parents to speak with them children about the situation. Below, you will find tips for moms talking to their kids about divorce.
Don’t Lay Blame
Many parents make the mistake of blaming their husbands for the divorce. This will prove to be a costly mistake and it will shape the child’s future opinion of you and your spouse. Do not tell your child that his or her father refused to work thing out. This will lead to more confusion and may cause your child to despise their father. Instead of using he, make sure you use we. Let your child know that the decision was mutual and will be best for everyone involved.
Not The Child’s Fault
Divorces can be immensely difficult for children, because they often believe they’re responsible. This is obviously never true and it needs to be stressed repeatedly. When speaking with your children, it is absolutely vital to tell them over and over again that the divorce is not their fault. Make is clear that the decision was made by you and your spouse. And of course, stress the fact that they were not to blame in any shape or form.
Get On With It
When it comes down to it, a lot of parents make the mistake of allowing their divorces to drag out for many years. They’ll bicker back and forth over the assets and other issues. This will prove to be a mistake. Make it clear to your child that the divorce will be over as quickly as possible. While parents often feel like they need to win and defeat their spouse, the only real loser will be the child. Make sure the divorce is over as quickly as possible to lessen the sting.
Always Take Responsibility
Remember that you are the adult in the relationship. Your child didn’t make the decision to get divorced. Whenever you speak to your child about the situation, you should make this obvious. Always accept the responsibility and consistently reassure your child that the divorce was not their doing!
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